27 Years Ago Today!

Twenty Seven years ago today most would say it was a tragedy, but out of the devastation came a miracle.

I was young, had just turned three on the 19th of December in 1982. We had Christmas as usual on the 25th but who would have known that 3 days after Christmas would come the BIGGEST turning point in not only my life but of the life of my entire family!

It was December 27th, 1982 when my biological father took a knife and stabbed and killed my biological mother. He then stabbed me in the abdomen, the knife thrusting in my stomach and exiting out of my back. He wrapped me in sheets and left me in the bed to die. With my mother dead and me dieing in the bed he sat watching television and smoking his cigarette in the living room.

In the mean time my aunt Donna had called the police and they responded to our apartment for a domestic disturbance. Little did they know that as they opened the door they would walk into my mother's body on the floor of the entry way and then finally find me wrapped in the bed.

OK so that is the tragedy, but what about the miracle? The rest of the story is amazing and you can truly see God's hand in the whole thing!

The Chief of police, Chief Smythe found me and instead of waiting for an ambulance, placed me in his police car and rushed me to the emergency room. Now this isn't what should have happened because if I would have died in his car then he would have been charged with my death. Thank God he did as the hospital staff said if he had waited for the ambulance or even for a minute or two longer I would not have made, I would have died! Thank you God and thank you Chief Smythe!

At the hospital, was rushed right into exploratory surgery to see what organs were damaged. I don't know what the surgeons facial expression was as he approached my Aunt Donna and Uncle Matt but I am sure it was of confusion, amazement, and relief as he could give some good news. The surgeon reported that miraculously "not one vital organ was damaged. It was as if someone placed their hand in her stomach and moved all the organs out of the way." There was no way that the organs should have been untouched. That's my God with His hand of protection! However the doctor reported that I did have some nerve damage and would not be able to walk again. God's healing hand was on me, as I left the hospital some time after this event I left able to walk out! Praise God!

My aunt and uncle took me in as one of their children and today you know them as my mom and dad! My God protected me, He healed me, and He gave me a family that loved and served Him and loved me too!

As we are still in the Christmas mind frame, remember the real reason we celebrate, because God sent his son as an infant so He could die for our sins on that cross on Calvary. What a Savior, not because of His protection in my life in 1982 but because He died just for me and He died just for you!

If you have never truly accepted the gift of God's son do that now, for tomorrow is not promised to us. He sent His son for you and all you have to do is accept the gift and believe Jesus died for you!

"For God so loved the world, that He gave his only son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish but have ever lasting life." John 3:16


Lord, thank you for your Son! Thank you for being so evident in my life. I pray that as others read these words you reveal the times in their life that you have been so clearly there with them! Reveal to them that you are there right now. You are an awesome God who is our protector, provider, healer, and savior! Thank you Jesus! ~Amen



To read Philadelphia Inquirer's story from 2007 copy and paste this link:
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?v=app_2373072738&ref=ts&gid=8289445939#/topic.php?uid=8289445939&topic=5496

Santa Pictures

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! Remember that Jesus is the reason we celebrate Christmas! Thank God that He sent His son to earth for us!

This morning was filled with the fun and joy of opening gifts with the boys. What a great morning with family. I will post pictures later, first I have to go take a short nap.

P.S. I am typing this on my Mac which is Jeremy and my Christmas present that my mom so graciously gave us early! Thanks Mom!

Birthday Weekend!

Well this weekend I turned 30! It isn't bad at all! I realize though that I am a married mother of three and that my days of no responsibility are LONG gone! It makes you feel old for a moment but I am absolutely loving it!

Saturday was my birthday and it was a day full of SNOW! I was born in a blizzard so only fitting that on the day I turn 30 it was snowing severely. It was absolutely beautiful and I will post some pics I took a little later.

The day started off with breakfast in bed from my husband and the boys...which the boys decided to help me eat. Then off to running around in the snow for Tylenol and tissues because my boys have been sick.

Later in the evening we all enjoyed a steak dinner courtesy of my mom and a delicious raspberry filled cake courtesy of Todd and Tammi (we missed you Todd). Then a nightly call off pain from Nathan as he awoke crying with an ear infection.

My birthday weekend was complete when our good friends Scott and Debra got tickets to the Eagles game last night and invited Jeremy and I to go. Thanks to our friends Yoldanda and Tony who watched our children we were able to go. What an awesome game despite the cold weather! We were 3 rows from the field on the 49ers 20 yard line. I could practically touch the players...although the players on our side were the 49ers so it wasn't so tempting...it was GREAT!

And the finale of the weekend was when we got home from the game, Aaron's fever followed by him throwing up all over the couch. Then when I finally get to sleep Jeremy Jr. waking at 1:30am with an ear infection, screaming crying.

I wouldn't trade my life in for anything! What an awesome time of reflection on my life. Now off to take all three boys to the doctors!

Time is not my Friend...

Well posting a blog seems to be getting harder and harder for me. I told my girlfriend that I have just lost the blog interest but I have found that, that is not the case. I often think about blogging in my daily routine and want to blog. I have found though with three very busy children with the third being 16 months with 8 arms (don't let him fool ya with just the 2 you see) that I run out of time to sit and do much of anything on the computer. I usually update my facebook and send emails through my phone while on the run. It is just too hard to blog from my phone (nope there is not an app for that, go figure).

So for those of you that like to follow along, don't get too frustrated, I will continue to try to get a blog in more frequently but for now time is not my friend and so you may have to deal with some more random postings. Thanks for following!

P.S. I wish I had some more time I have so much to share! aaaaaahhhhh!!!! It's just as frustrating to me to have so much to share and no time to share it! Ok gotta go!

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving All! I have been blessed with an extraordinary family, wonderful friends, and a great church family! What more can anyone ask for?!

There is so much to be thankful for! My God has rocked my world, my children are healthy, and I have spent the day with my family despite the obstacles that have tried to stop that from happening!

I would love to hear what your thankful for; comment.

Renovations 08-09: A Window in the Soul

Off to the Crazy House!

Well what a crazy couple of days...well everyday here at the Schoenrock residence is crazy!

Jeremy was away for men's conference this weekend. I was home with three kids and spent the entire weekend moving three sets of furniture. Along with the help of Jordan, Shanice, and Shania! I am still sore but it was worth it cause now I have a new (to me but used from my mom) living room set! Thanks mom!

Monday was back to work as normal. Running around dropping off, picking up, and watching up to six kids during the day! I told you it was crazy here.

Today of course was just as crazy but with a little twist. I usually pick Jeremy Jr. up from school at 11:30. He has begged me since the start of school to ride the bus. So yesterday I told him if he listened for the entire day he could ride the bus home from school. Well of course he was a good listener. So I wrote a letter to his teacher telling her that Jeremy would be riding home on the bus. As I stood on the hill of the field with Nathan, Aaron, and Karlia the bus drove down the street and passed me to the corner and as it passed I caught a glimpse of Jeremy Jr. happy as could be chatting with his buddy's like an adult on Septa. At that moment my heart sank and the reality of him getting older and growing up set in more then him going off to his first day of school! What a big boy he is! I can't stand it!

Everything else is pretty normal, if crazy is normal for you. :)

Looking forward to the weekend!

It is only the middle of the week and already it feels like it should have ended days ago. I had a not stop weekend that was filled with kids which lead to a busy week and yup that has been filled with kids too.

One of my highlights this week was getting to hang with my girl Emma while her mommy went to get her hair cut. She is so awesome!

Today not such an up day though. I have been fighting a sinus infection since Friday, today was extremely bothersome. Nathan had behavioral therapy today which seems to just be a waste of time as the therapist says there is nothing she can help with. So I go through the stress of having the therapist come for what reason. So we went to the library today as she wants to see how Nathan acts in public. Of course he was a saint.

On the way into the library I twisted my ankle while holding Aaron and we both went crashing down on the pavement. I now have a sore ankle, two busted knees, a sore wrist and shoulder from trying to catch myself so Aaron didn't smack the pavement. I didn't do well as Aaron's head whacked the sidewalk. It sounds worse then it was but I felt sooooo bad. Aaron is doing fine with just a slight bump on his head.

I am so thankful that I have a day off tomorrow before I have all six kids for a full day friday because school is off! Pray for me to make it through the rest of the week.

Ok I am being slightly dramatic about the week but what fun would it be to read a blog that has no drama. haha still Prayers would be great! Looking forward to the weekend!!!!!!!!!

Update on the Fam

So yes I finally got a new computer and some of my blog followers gave me a bad time because I said I would post but I haven't. Well I have been updating the computer and syncing it with my iPhone and getting to know it. So now I am ready to go. I figured I would update you all on the family for my first official post on the MAC! (ok its the 2nd post)

Jeremy Jr. has started kindergarten this year. He is doing AWESOME! We had a little problem the 1st week of school with him being very silly but since that note came home and we had a talk with Jeremy he has been doing great. This week was his first week of homework and he knew it all. I barely had to help. Wow he is really growing up in just a couple weeks.

Nathaniel is doing very well since his surgery. He had a pacemaker check by phone yesterday and the tech said it all looks good. Nathan is having a slight difficult time with Jeremy being in school but he is coming into himself and not relying on Jeremy much anymore to make up his mind for him. He is growing up fast too! With other health issues with

Nathan he sees a behavioral specialist once a week, as he was diagnosed with a Behavior Disorder (NOS) a couple months before the surgery. The Behavioral specialist this week said that she thinks that Nathan's behaviors are not due to a behavior disorder but a processing disorder. She thinks his brain is processing much slower than that of a normal person. This sounds more likely to me as well, since I have been stressing to all the Dr.'s that he understands my words but doesn't seem to get what I'm saying. This whole process is made difficult because Nathan is home with me instead of at daycare in a school setting. We are working on that as he is on a waiting list for Head Start. So our next step is to get Nathan tested. He really is doing great though!!!!

Aaron just had is 1 year check up. Yes he is 14 1/2 months but we were late due to Nathan's surgery. He is well. Out of all the children Aaron is the only one that has not been to the doctor's for a sick visit during his first year. He is the boy that doesn't get sick! Amazing since Jeremy and Nathan were both very sick their first years of life with Asthma and ear infections, etc. Not Aaron so far he is healthy, healthy. We do however have to look into Early Intervention for Aaron as his development is behind. He only has three words and he mimics them, not using them purposely. He can say dada, mama, and baby but all repeated. Oh he can say NO too! He also isn't using body language to express himself. For example he doesn't raise his arms to be picked up, he doesn't wave, he doesn't point, etc. There are other things that the doctor asked if he was doing and it was clear he was behind. So we will start with therapy and see what happens. Since Aaron was born I've said he reminds me of Nathan alot with his mannerisms. Let's just hope this is all because he knows he is the baby and wants to be waited on hand and foot. haha Overall though he is doing well!

Jeremy Sr. is a guy and doesn't share what's on his mind (haha) so as far as I know he is doing well.

As for myself, I seem to be a zombie. I know Nathan's surgery was 12 weeks ago and he is back to normal but I have just been messed up since. It was a break in my routine and I have not found my nitch again. I hate to admit it because I feel like I should be back to normal especially since Nathan who is 3 is more back to normal then me. I have been so discombobulated that I have missed therapy appointments and other appointments and that is not normal for me. I am a deer in headlights just waiting to get slammed! I am doing good though. I know that seems like an oxymoron but its true. Though I am out of it I know that I serve a big God and there is no serious things going on so in the long run I am good!!!! So I just tell myself:

Life is Life! Just deal with it!

- Christina

I'm Back and I'm a MAC!

That's right cyber world. I have been missing from this place for a while, except for the occasionally blog or update from my iPhone. I have been having problems with computers and such, but no longer because I'm Back and I'm a MAC!

Yup no more PC I switched to MAC. Thanks to my Mom that is! She got Jeremy and I a MacBook for Christmas. Yes I know it's not Christmas yet but we have been having such trouble with our other laptop that my mom had compassion on us and gave us our Christmas present early! You Rock Mom!

So Yes Debra that means blogs will be posted and I will also be reading blogs, so you can rest assured I will be caught up. You will no longer have to ask me, "Didn't you read the blog today?" lol love ya girl!

Jeremy Jr.'s 1st Day of School

How cute is he! This was Jeremy Jr.'s first day of Kindergarten. He is so big. It is amazing how much he has matured in only a week of school. What a drastic change.

I look forward to the rest of this year and what it will bring and how Jeremy Jr. will grow and change in this year!

Let's hope we don't get anymore behavior notes home like we did at the end of the first week. I called it, he is the class clown. :( He is so cute though!

Had A Bad Day

So Jeremy Jr. has been a little on edge with everything that has been going on and the anxiety of starting school. His new phrase is "I'm having a bad day!" and he gets all mopey. So today I sat with him rocking him on my lap and listened to this song to signify the bad day and once the song was over we would try to move on. It worked well I think I'll keep trying it every time he says, "I'm having a bad day"!

Mourning Booth

So Todd showed me this video tonight. This sums up where I am right now. Not just because my Dad died but just the different things in my life throughout this period have brought me to the "valley". I know that God will see me through and that He is my comfort but I need to mourn. I need to go through this period in my life. I need to cry!!!!!!

It's Been One Year! I Miss You DAD!

This past Wednesday, August 26th was the one year anniversary of my father's passing. I miss him so very much! I love you Dad and I will see you when I get to heaven! I know you want to show God the guitar chord but give the guitar back and let him play too! That was a joke between us if you want to know more you can leave a comment.

Aaron's First Haircut!

Second Home Care Visit

Before we went to the hospital the pre-admissions nurse told us that if Nathan could still fit in a onsie that we should get some so Nathan could scratch at his sores. My mom picked some up and we were amazed that they were big enough. We hadn't had to use them, that is until today. Last night Nathan decided to pick off all the steri strips from his sternum incision. He also picked the scab under that incision that was from the drain. That left a very fresh and sore indent.

We had our second and final home nursing visit and she said Nathan looks great. She feels that we don't need anymore visits but is going to check with Nathan's pacer team and see if they are concerned about him pulling off his strips. If they are we might have another nursing visit. But all in all Nathan is doing wonderful!

Me on the other hand, I'm not doing so hot. For whatever reason I have become depressed. I just want to find a big rock and his there with no one to bother me for a good month. I probably would get lonely but that is how I feel. I think was is playing a part in me feeling thus way has to deal with the way I cope. While everything is happening I am in what I call " business mode" where I just get done what needs to get done and there is no time for emotions. Now that things have settled down I deal with all the emotions of the event and with that and the lack of sleep I got while in the hospital topped with financial struggle is probably what caused my depression. It doesn't help that the financial struggle is worrying Jeremy and putting more areas on our relationship.

I know despite how I feel, God is my provider. He has provided continuously for us and I know He will continue to do so! Please continue to pray for Nathan but also for me and the entire family!

Out of Touch

Hello all! It feels like forever since I wrote. I haven't been able to get the Internet back yet and when I am where I can get it my computer doesn't want to stay working for more then five minutes.

Nathan us doing extremely well! He us running and playing like any normal three year old. Though I am glad to see that he is not too much back to normal or he would probably hurt himself.

Things at home are starting to slowly get back into a grove. I think I need to get back into a normal grove more then anybody. The boys seem into theirs already. The three of them are so cute.

Well I have been out of touch for so long I thought I would say hi. When I have more time tomorrow I will fill you in on the details of what's been going on. Thank you all for your continued prayers.

Sorry...No Updates

It has been great to be home. I have to get used to the idea that this pacemaker will continue to work properly and I won't have to check Nathan so often. I guess you could say I am a little paranoid after watching his heart beat improperly for two weeks. It will just take time to get used to the idea that a machine is what jeeps my boys heart going correctly.

Nathan us doing great. He us running around he like he has no limits. He is still sore and slow going but all in all he us great. We go Wednesday for a follow up with his cardiologist and the pacer specialist. I will update you on what happens.

Jeremy Jr and Aaron are so happy to have us home and we are all taking some time to readjust.

Sorry for not updating lately. Our Internet is off and so until I get that taken care of I am blogging from my phone which as awesome as the iPhone is it is hard to blog on. Once we rectify the Internet problem I promise I will put up some pictures.

Home, Finally!

What a busy day. We left the hospital around 3pm dropped off our prescriptions on the way and then finally arrived home. It took pretty much the rest of the day and early evening to get settled and get things put away.

Nathan is doing great. He turned into more I'd himself once we got home and I don't even think he said ouch more then 5 times. He us amazing.

Jeremy and I are exhuasted and heading to bed. I have pictures of our homecoming that I will post tomorrow.

Homecoming

The plan is that we are heading home this morning! I feel like we should be having a pep rally and a parade to celebrate, we've been here so long. Ha ha

Today will be busy with trying to get out of here and then with getting Nathan settled at home so I won't update until later in the afternoon if not early evening. If something does change though I will post a short update.

When we get home I have tins of pictures of our stay that I will start posting. Even with all this stuff going on Nathan was so stinkin cute!

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers and please continue to pray for Nathans recovery.

We Moved!

Today Nathan moved out of the ICU! We are in the Cardiac Care Unit (CCU). The plan today is to remove the chest tube, have Nathan drink more and have a bowel movement. If we get those things accomplished today the goal is we will be coming home tomorrow.

I know it may be silly but let's pray for poop!

Oh Uncle Scott!!

Nathan is doing better today. We have been able to get his pain controlled, fever down, and that cold foot warm. Our steps today are to getting Nathan eating and drinking again, and out of bed for a little bit. Though Nathan has thrown up this morning it is only due to the pain meds making him nauseous and other then that we are on our way to a full recovery! Here is Nathan as of last night:


One technique we us to get Nathan back to himself is to have Aunt Debra and uncle Scott visit. After Surgery Nathan doesn't talk, doesn't smile, doesn't move and if you try to get him to smile he just roles his eyes and looks away or closes them. We have found though that when Aunt Debra and Uncle Scott visits this all changes. Here's why:



And here is Nathan just about 30 minutes ago, taking his 1st post-op walk:

Much Better

Nathan is good...off oxygen awake more n talking tonight...foot is good...don't know about the fluid but they don't seem concerned... no fever...Praise God he is doing better.

I will be able to have some down time where I can update the blog on the computer instead if from my phone so I will go into more details and post some pictures for you all.

Fever, Foot, Fluid

Nathan continues with a low grade fever and cold feet.  They say the coldness could be that the veins have constricted because of the fever which is normal but that hasn't been verified.  This morning I've learned Nathan has fluid in his lungs and he is still on the oxygen.

Also Nathan is in alot of pain. The type of incision and where it is located, the doctors said it is the most painful.

He is doing great though and fighting like a little champ!

Fever and Cold Feet

Nathan was doing well after his surgery but has recently developed a fever that has increased even with tylenol given.  A fever can be a sign of infection. Also his feet are cold to the touch which can be a sign of poor circulation.  Niether an infection or poor circulation have been confirmed but let's cover Nathan in prayer!

Update

This is Deb, blogging for Christina!

As you know, Nathan came through the surgery well and has been sleeping most of the day. He is starting to rouse now and the main concern is managing his pain.

Currently Nathan's heart rate is 114 bpm, which is great and compare that to the 52bpm high it reached yesterday, that's pretty significant!

Nathan has already requested Curious George on the TV! Apparently they watched it 4 times yesterday too - gotta love kids!!

No word on when he'll be coming home but Christina doesn't think it will be earlier than Thursday.

I'll leave it to Christina to give you more details when she can get to the computer.

Deb, out!

Pacer is In!

Nathan made it through surgery just fine. They are waking him up now and I will see him in about 20 minutes. I will fill you all in on the details when I get settled.

First Update

Nurse came out and told me Nathans doing well. They are in the middle of the procedure and should be done anywhere from 30min to an hour. I'll update you all as soon as I get the update.

Better late than never

The surgeon is behind schedule but we are heading for surgery. Heading to the OR in about 10 minutes.

Pacemaker Surgery

An abnormal change in either the rate or pattern of the heartbeat is called arrhythmia (or dysrhythmia). When this happens, the heart may beat too slowly (bradycardia).


Bradycardia
(this is what Nathan has)

A heart rate that is "too slow" to meet the body's needs is called bradycardia (braid-a-card-e-ah). Bradycardia is most commonly caused by either heart block and/or sick sinus syndrome.


Heart Block (or AV Block)
(this is what Nathan has)

In heart block, the impulse that normally travels from the atria to the ventricles is either delayed or stopped. It doesn't mean the blood flow is blocked. It means that the flow of the electrical impulse within the heart is blocked.

Heart block can be either complete or incomplete. Nathan has complete heart block. With complete heart block, no electrical impulses reach the ventricles from the atria.


Type of Pacemaker

- A Dual Chamber Pacemaker
This is the pacemaker needed to correct Nathan's heart.
It has two pacing leads. One lead is placed in or on the atrium, and the other placed in or on the ventricle.




Pacemaker
Placement
- Epicardial
For Nathan the surgeon has chosen the epicardial method. With this method the lead is placed on the external (epicardial) surface of the heart.

The incision to place the leads will be
- under the arm pit (thoractomy)

The "pocket" for the generator (battery) will be made in the upper abdomen just under the rib cage.

The epicardial method is most often used in children whose veins are too small to use the transvenous method.


Tomorrow's Surgery
Nathan's surgery is scheduled for 7:30am. The biggest risk for this surgery is infection. If there is an infection the entire system will need to be replaced. Though Nathan's surgery is scheduled for 7:30am things will get started tonight. Around midnight Nathan will get a special bath that will cleanse him of bacteria. Sometime after that Nathan will have an IV placed. Then of course he will head off to the O.R. early to get set up and start sedation then head for surgery.

There is a possibility that Nathan's surgery will be cancelled tomorrow, however. The Surgeon came by awhile ago and informed us he has an emergency heart transplant this evening. Depending on how that goes and if the surgeon gets any sleep will depend on whether or not we get moved to the next day. I will update you all as soon as I know!

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers!

In God We (Nearly) Trust

This seemed to ring perfect in my heart, as the storms of life come and go, and we all know that we, the Schoenrock's, are in one now. We trust that God cares and He knows best!

In God We (Nearly) Trust
by Max Lucado

A few days before our wedding, Denalyn and I enjoyed and endured a sailing voyage. Milt, a Miami church friend, had invited Denalyn, her mom, and me to join him and a few others on a leisurely cruise along the Florida coast.

Initially it was just that. Leisure. We stretched out on cushions, hung feet over the side, caught some zzz's and rays. Nice.

But then came the storm. The sky darkened, the rain started, and the flat ocean humped like a dragon's neck. Sudden waves of water tilted the vessel up until we saw nothing but sky and then downward until we saw nothing but blue. I learned this about sailing: there is nothing swell about a swell. Tanning stopped. Napping ceased. Eyes turned first to the thunderclouds, then to the captain. We looked to Milt.

He was deliberate and decisive. He told some people where to sit, others what to do, and all of us to hang on. And we did what he said. Why? We knew he knew best. No one else knew the difference between starboard and stern. Only Milt did. We trusted him. We knew he knew.

And we knew we didn't. Prior to the winds, we might have boasted about Boy Scout merit badges in sailing or bass-boat excursions. But once the storm hit, we shut up. (Except for Denalyn, who threw up.) We had no choice but to trust Milt. He knew what we didn't--and he cared. The vessel was captained, not by a hireling or a stranger, but by a pal. Our safety mattered to him. So we trusted him.

Oh, that the choice were equally easy in life. Need I remind you about your westerly winds? With the speed of lightning and the force of a thunderclap, williwaws anger tranquil waters. Victims of sudden storms populate unemployment lines and ICU wards. You know the winds. You've felt the waves. Good-bye, smooth sailing. Hello, rough waters.

Such typhoons test our trust in the Captain. Does God know what he is doing? Can he get us out? Why did he allow the storm?

Can you say about God what I said about Milt?
I know God knows what's best.
I know I don't.
I know he cares.

Such words come easily when the water is calm. But when you're looking at a wrecked car or a suspicious-looking mole, when war breaks out or thieves break in, do you trust him?

To embrace God's sovereignty is to drink from the well of his lordship and make a sailboat-in-the-storm decision. Not in regard to Milt and the sea, but in regard to God and life. You look toward the Captain and resolve: he knows what's best.

From
Come Thirsty
© (Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2004) Max Lucado

It's Really Tomorrow

Well what a busy weekend. I made a short post on Friday about Aaron turning one and you all haven't heard from me since. Well i kind of took the weekend off, I guess you could say. There was nothing going on here at the hospital so while I had the chance I slipped away to have two great nice of sleep in a real bed. Don't worry just because I was off doesn't mean I didn't come and visit, I just didn't sleep here.

OK so here is a summary of my weekend. I went home Friday as soon as Jeremy arrived to spend time with my birthday boy. Here is a picture of him having some Boston Creme Pie (thanks Judy). Man what a change in only a couple weeks. Aaron missed his mommy, showing off his walking ability and then begging to sit with me, and he did, he just sat there enjoying the moment and so did I. It was one of those precious moments.

Saturday I slept in (a little) then took my time gathering what was needed for the hospital and then headed back to CHOP to see my Nathan. Jeremy was here all day so I just got to enjoy hanging out with him instead of taking care of stuff. Back home I went that night for another wonderful sleep in my bed. Thanks Todd, Tammi, and Inga for my new bed set!!

Yesterday, Sunday I actually took the whole day off from being at the hospital. It was my sisters bridal shower. I needed a break, a complete day from not being at CHOP. Though I got overwhelmed, making hors d'oeuvres and Jeremy Jr. finding a tick on his leg that tied together with other events made us extremely late, once I got there I realized it all didn't matter. The ladies in the bridal party covered for me and my responsibilities for the party and let me just enjoy and relax! You guys (or ladies I should day) are all great! Huge thanks to my mom too for taking care of everything I was suppose too! I love my Mom! After the party I went home to gather my stuff together and headed back to CHOP with Tammi, Jeremy Jr., and Aaron. Boy was that a handful in this little room here but Nathan had wanted to see them all. The cutest thing was when we first arrived Aaron was sitting on my lap, Nathan sitting next to me and for about 5 minutes Nathan just kept pinching Aaron's cheek saying "Aren't you a cutie". How precious is that! I wish I had gotten and picture.

So Today, I'm back at the hospital and I ran into Dr. Gayner who is Nathan's heart surgeon and we are on for tomorrow to have surgery to install the pacemaker. I don't know any specifics as we talked in passing. He will stop in along with a ton of people for consent and all that good stuff, so once I know details I will post it all as soon as I can today. I did get a chance to hold a pacemaker and check it out today and this is what it looks like.

Though the statistics are that after surgery the heart, if it is going to return to normal function, will do so within 7 - 10 days and this being day 12 does not discourage me. Our God is a big God. He can all things and is not limited to statistics. Please continue praying that Nathan's heart return to normal function. As we have prayed and I have read scripture and have been given words of encouragement from friends, I know that God's will shall be done. I will not loose heart and neither shall you if our prayers aren't answered in the way we thought they should. God has a purpose for Nathan's life and if having a pacemaker installed is part of that purpose then so be it. We may not understand but its cool cause we're not God, ha ha. Continue praying that the Lord's will be done. Pray protection on my son through the night and through the surgery. Thank you all!

Happy Birthday Aaron

Today is my little big boys birthday!

Happy 1st Birthday

Aaron Matthew Todd Schoenrock

Surgery is not tomorrow

It is late and I am very tired but I wanted to update you all on what is going on with Nathan.  This will be the shortest blog I have ever posted.

Nathan's surgery to install the pacemaker is not going to be tomorrow (Friday) like I had posted yesterday.  It will be Monday or Tuesday as we had originally planned.  I will update you on the specifics tomorrow as I am heading to bed now.

Good Night all!

Faster heart, faster

Once Nathan awakes his heart rate increases to about 60.  So today was like any other day here, except that Nathan was tied and cranky from the lack of sleep last night.  

He did however eat a drink more today so we are moving forward.  He also told his heart, "Faster heart, faster!"

As of this evening we have a new plan.  Tomorrow we have an echo cardiogram scheduled and most likely will schedule the surgery to install the pacemaker for Friday.  We should know by tomorrow evening at the latest when the surgery is.  If we schedule it for Friday, they tell us there is a 24 hour watch period after and as long as all is well we will be going home.  So we are estimating Sunday morning at the earliest to return home.

As much as we would love for Nathan's heart to return to normal Jeremy and I know that we don't have the whole picture.  God knows what he is doing.  We are trusting in God whole heartily and look forward to making Nathan more comfortable and getting him home to return to some normalcy.  

Thank you for all your prayers and thoughts and we ask that you continue praying for God's will to be done!  Whether that be his heart fixing itself or the pacemaker, it is up to God!

Here is a picture of one of Nathan's first walks after his initial surgery.  Jen this one is for you!

(Check out that diaper butt!  How cute!)

Long Night

Just a quick update and a prayer request.  It has been a very long night.  Nathan's heart rate has dropped below 50.  The nursing staff has been monitoring him very closely but all are concerned.  Nurses from the entire floor have stopped in if they didn't see our nurse around to make sure we were OK.  A couple even came over when the nurse was there.  With his heart rate being that low there is not much room to mess around.  What they watch for however is the blood pressure and to make sure his blood flow is still circulating through his body properly.  All of these things are great so we are just waiting the low heart rate out.

The problem is, and it is a good problem if you think about it, when the heart rate is that low his body won't let him fall into too deep sleep, it keeps waking him up.  It also causes him to be extra cranky and add that to a lack of sleep and we are looking at an even longer day today.  Because of him not sleeping well and crying all night I have been up with him.  I will, thankfully,  have a chance to sleep today and am heading to bed in a minute.

We are asking that you keep Nathan in prayer as you have been.  Pray for wisdom for the doctors and that Jeremy and I continue to rely on God and be reminded that His will be done not ours!

It is not about ME

Everything here at Children's Hospital is pretty much the same.  Nathan is still in heart block and we are just waiting.  He has started eating and drinking today and actually "asked" for a drink instead of me forcing it on him.  I spoke with the Surgeon today and he said that we will schedule the surgery to put in the pacemaker for Monday or Tuesday of next week.

In the mean time I felt God impress that I should wait out this out for the whole ten days regardless of I was feeling OK about have the procedure done.  Below is a devotional I read tonight that really touch on my struggles from last week.  I posted earlier about how I had been spending time with the Lord more and really worked this out with God.  I am putting my trust in Him daily.  And for me that is no small feat cause I have control issues.  God is chiseling me away to reveal the Christ in me!

My Struggles are About Him 
by Max Lucado

What about your struggles? Is there any chance, any possibility, that you have been selected to struggle for God's glory? Have you "been granted for Christ's sake, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake" (Philippians 1:29)?

Here is a clue. Do your prayers seem to be unanswered? What you request and what you receive aren't matching up? Don't think God is not listening. Indeed he is. He may have higher plans.

Here is another. Are people strengthened by your struggles? A friend of mine can answer yes. His cancer was consuming more than his body; it was eating away at his faith. Unanswered petitions perplexed him. Well-meaning Christians confused him. "If you have faith," they said, "you will be healed."

No healing came. Just more chemo, nausea, and questions. He assumed the fault was a small faith. I suggested another answer. "It's not about you," I told him. "Your hospital room is a showcase for your Maker. Your faith in the face of suffering cranks up the volume of God's song."

Oh, that you could have seen the relief on his face. To know that he hadn't failed God and God hadn't failed him--this made all the difference. Seeing his sickness in the scope of God's sovereign plan gave his condition a sense of dignity. He accepted his cancer as an assignment from heaven: a missionary to the cancer ward.

A week later I saw him again. "I reflected God," he said, smiling through a thin face, "to the nurse, the doctors, my friends. Who knows who needed to see God, but I did my best to make him seen."

Bingo. His cancer paraded the power of Jesus down the Main Street of his world.

God will use whatever he wants to display his glory. Heavens and stars. History and nations. People and problems.

Rather than begrudge your problem, explore it. Ponder it. And most of all, use it. Use it to the glory of God.

Through your problems and mine, may God be seen.

From
It's Not About Me
© (Thomas Nelson, 2007),
Max Lucado

Update on Nathan's Progress

Nathan had surgery on Wednesday July 15th.  He came through the surgery wonderfully and was doing well after.  We ran into a set back when Nathan's heart did not return to beating at a normal rhythm, which is called sinus rhythm.  Instead Nathan was and still in experiencing heart block.

Heart block after surgery can usually correct itself within 7-10 days after surgery.  After the waiting period if the heart does not return to normal our surgeon will install an internal pacemaker.  Nathan's heart is showing signs of wanting to return normal but has not fully recovered and in fact is beating at a much slower rate as well.  Because of this Nathan still has pace wires running from his heart through his chest in case we need to attach an external pacemaker.

The heart block and slowed rate do not affect Nathan like you would think and he is (almost) as active as ever.  We are having some other complications not related to the direct surgery, like constipation, vomiting, and lack of eating and drinking which we are handling now but other then that we are just in the waiting game.

So here is the plan.  The surgeon has Nathan in the Cardiac Intensive Care Unit (CICU) observing him with a one on one nurse daily.  His plan was to wait for at least the 7 days to let the heart try to fix itself.  In speaking with him today we discussed waiting for the total 10 days.  So if we go with 7 days that would put surgery on Wednesday then a 24 hour recovery and most likely released by Friday A.M.  If we wait the 10 days that would put us to Saturday, and the probably won't do surgery on a Saturday, so that would probably be scheduled Monday with the 24 hours after that puts us returning home next Wednesday morning.  For now though the surgeon is just taking it day by day so nothing is setup yet.

The good thing about waiting is that we can get our consults done.  Some of you may know that Nathan sees several specialist.  Once we are done here at the hospital we have a hearing test and audiology appointment scheduled and soon to follow an Occupational Therapy evaluation and Speech Therapy evaluation.  Since we are here and just waiting they informed me that I could get this all done here!!!!! (Yes Deb I know you told me first)  That is so great!

Ok bottom line or summary if that's how you would like to put it.  Nathan had surgery on the 15th repairing a VSD and removing sub aortic membrane.  He has been in heart block and slowed rate since the surgery.  Complications of eating and drinking, constipation, and vomiting have been what we have been dealing with while we wait 7-10 days for the heart to return to it's normal sinus rhythm.  In 7-10 days it doesn't fix itself Nathan will have an internal pacemaker put in.

We are just waiting!

What a Mighty God We Serve

This song has been stuck in my head.  God has been just placing songs that I haven't heard or sang in years on my heart.  I am currently singing praises to His name in spite of my circumstances!

Nathan is doing well.  Everything is pretty much the same.  He is still in heart block and his rate is still 60s during the day and 50s when sleeping.  Waiting for the 7-10 day period, in which it sometimes takes for it to return to normal, then we will surgically install the pacemaker.

Despite how Nathan feels he is staying fairly happy!  This picture is of Pastor Bob playing Cars (the movie) with Nathan that Esther and him had purchased as a gift for Nathan, so cute right?!

Today was a bit of a difficult day, however was made SO MUCH easier by Nathan's nurse Jen.  Boy did he like her.  Nathan of course has some sensory integration as well as some sensory ad version, so it often takes a couple of times for him to warm up to you.  Well that was not the case with Lauren that was with us several nights in room 3 and especially not with Jen who was with us today.  They just hit it off.

Nathan is not eating or drinking much and so the fear is we may have to do an IV again which we are trying so desperately to avoid.  What might be playing a part in this is Nathan's bowls.  He hasn't had a bowl movement since the day before his surgery.  So the difficult part of today was getting Nathan to go potty.  Despite our lack of trying it didn't work so great.  We got things moving though.  After torturing Nathan with trying to go potty I wasn't sure that his new found love for his nurse would last but it did.  He said goodbye to her.  WOW!  Jen your great! (I promise I will get the diaper pic up)

On another note, I have mentioned in several blogs about how I have been pressing into my relationship with God, well He rocks my socks off.  It has been several months and each day we just get closer and closer.  I can't remember the last time I "got lost" in the scriptures.  Usually I am doing my daily duty or researching my lesson for youth group.  Tonight totally "lost"/engulfed in the Scriptures.  What a Mighty God We Serve!  The cool thing is that we have been growing closer before this whole heart surgery with Nathan started so I am encouraged that once this is over my new found love for my Lord that has been buried so far in my heart will not dissipate!

Thank you all for your prayers and support please continue to lift Nathan up in prayer to our God!

God's Chisel

I have been drawing closer to God in the last couple of weeks, especially with what has been going on with Nathan.  I have realized that I have a lot of work that still needs to be done in my life.  Todd has shown me these guys and they do a great job in portraying the need for our God.  

Let God chisel away what needs to be removed!

Wrap Me In Your Arms

The last too nights have been rough.  During the day Nathan does well and if you were to see him he looks and acts great.  His heart continues to go in and out of heart block and his rate is still very low.  However when Nathan falls asleep his heart rate drops even lower to the low 50s.  

Each night we watch and wait and pray that his little heart would get stronger and start beating the way it should.  Though a pacemaker would be the worst of things and Nathan could live a normal life it's also not what anyone including the doctors are wanting for this little guy.  

As I prayed this song came to my heart:

Lord I pray that you wrap Nathan in your arms!

Just Waiting to Get The Rhythm

Blog entered by Todd (if you don't know whom I am, ask Christina)

I made it to CHOP and this is what I found...

• A little 3 year old boy that is feeling better this afternoon than this morning (sick tummy)
• A recovering (open) heart surgery patience trying to get his heart in a good sinus rhythm (regular 70 to 90 beats a minute) not happening at this time but working hard to get it "in rhythm". He had a bit of a setback last night but DID NOT go back on the pacer.
  
• A BIG family supporting each other (thank you and God bless the LCF family).
• A Mom and Dad preforming well under pressure, tired, "sore knees" but doing a Dad/Grandfather proud.
• A well trained group of people very, very committed to helping "little ones" get better...(Thank you CHOP staff).
• A group a people relying on God and calling on his POWER to heal and comfort.

Here is a couple of images to illustrate the recover efforts (they do walk-abouts)


I shared these lyrics with Jeremy and Christina but all can use a good Praise reminder.


Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
You do not faint
You won't grow weary
You're the defender of the weak
You comfort those in need
You lift us up on wings like eagles

Chris Tomlin

What a Difference a Day Makes!

Today has been an exceptional day!  It started off slow with some worry but after his morning nap Nathan woke up a different person.

When Nathan woke up this afternoon I asked how his nap was, his response "it was WONDERFUL" (his emphasis).  Since then the Nathan that we all know and love was back.

After a little coxing to eat he finished half a bowl of cereal.  We then removed the rest of his IVs and the arterial line so he was free to move around.  He still has his pacer wires and his heart monitor on but that is not as limited.  

Then was the HUGE turning point, Nathan got out of bed and took a walk!  Praise God!  Immediately his heart rate went from 65 to 70 and has stayed put.  

Nathan has since eaten a couple bites of PB&J, hopped off the end of the bed to show off his new ability of getting up to Pastor Bob and Ms. Esther, and went for another walk around the floor later with Mommy and Grammy.

If only the heart block would correct and the rate would continue to increase we would be set!  God is still at work and already you can see the healing that He has provided!

So for tonight the surgeon wants to be extra careful and is keeping Nathan in the ICU for a little while longer.  They are hoping that tomorrow may be the day that he moves to a more permanent room out of ICU.  My feeling is that surgeon is going to definitely put in the pacemaker if Nathan's heart doesn't correct itself by the end 

of the day tomorrow.  Let us come together and pray HARD that this little boys heart will correct itself tonight!  

Let's Get Up

Yesterday was such a roller coaster of things for Nathan.  He was taken off the pacer yesterday morning however his heart rate was still low and he was still in heart block.  He had a hard time waking  up and being verbal, not really any smiles either.

We were trying to get Nathan to eat something yesterday but he kept refusing.  By the afternoon we figured out why; Nathan started throwing up.  He then began to run a fever but nothing serious.  He was put back on the IV due to lack of drinking fluids once he became ill.

By early evening he wasn't really doing any better heart wise but was becoming more alert each time he awoke.  I had spoke with Debra earlier yesterday expressing that he was not really staying awake or being happy at all and suggested a visit from his Uncle Scott.  Later that day the Morton's visited and brought Jeremy Jr along too!

Jeremy Jr was so excited to see Nathan.  He was very emotional and didn't know how to responded to seeing Nathan like that.  He did very well!  It didn't help that Nathan was having dry heaves.

We had dinner with Jeremy Jr and the Morton's and then they had a time of visiting with Nathan.  Of course mom's hunch was correct; Nathan was the most awake the most verbal and the most happy we had seen him since he got here all because of Uncle Scott.  Too bad uncle Scott went back to work this week or I would make him stay here (Debra might not like that but you gotta do what you gotta do, haha).  Laughing at Uncle Scott tired Nathan out, but oh what a good tired it was.  He fell right to sleep for a while.

When he woke up we Skyped Grandpa Todd who is in Seattle for business.  Nathan wasn't much for talking but Todd and I were able to speak face to face and at the very least Grandpa could just look at his little buddy.

Nathan's heart started going crazy overnight.  It was a good crazy though.  The heart is still in heart block but has been flipping to sinus rhythm trying to fix itself.  The flipping back and forth has increased in frequency all during the night!  His heart rate is still down but it looks like it's trying to work on its own.  Keep Praying!!!!!

This morning Nathan is quite alert, not so chatty but that's ok, he's a little upset with me for leaving him to go sleep.  He gets a chest x-ray every morning and it showed some tiny spots on his lungs that have collapsed but the nurse said it was nothing to write home about.  I find it funny that I am doing just that though! haha!  The goal then today is to see if we can't get his arterial line out so he can get up and walking around and maybe visit the play room to get his lungs moving and working better.  Of course the other goal, which we can help with, is to get his heart in sinus rhythm with increased heart rate and also see if we can get some more fluids in and possibly get him eating.

I will keep you updated as the day goes on and as much as I can!

Thank you all for your prayers!!!!!!!!!

Removing the Hardware (at least some of it)

As of this morning Nathan was still on the external pacer and was pretty much the same as last night. After this mornings post the Doctors came around again and decided to remove some of Nathan's hardware. 

The major hardware was the external pacer!!! His heart rate is still low but higher then it was yesterday. He still is in heart block however they want to keep him off the pacer today to see if he can get back into normal rhythm.

Nathan was also able to remove one of his IVs, his catheter, his chest drain, and his arterial line that was directly in his heart. He still has one IV and the pace wires of course but with half the wires gone I was able to lift him ever so gently out of bed and hold him!

He has been waking up just ever so briefly but mostly sleeping the night and day away. The goal is to get him up for awhile and eating. He had about 4 bites of applesauce but is refusing all food. If you know Nathan at all you know that he NEVER refuses food especially PB&J or yogurt and even those items were refused. Th hope is that as he wakes he will desire more food.

Thank you to all for your love, support, and especially your prayers!

*Just a side not please call before coming up. Also we are limiting visitors to just family members at the moment as he is still not doing the best and we are still in the ICU. Thank you for your understanding!

Shocked through the Heart...

Nathan has what is called Heart Block. There are three different degrees of heart block and right now he has the third.


What is third-degree or complete heart block?

Complete heart block (complete AV block) means that the heart's electrical signal doesn't pass from the upper to the lower chambers. When this occurs, an independent pacemaker in the lower chambers takes over. The ventricles can contract and pump blood, but at a slower rate than that of the atrial pacemaker.

These impulses are called functional or ventricular scope beats. They're usually very slow and can't generate the signals needed to maintain full functioning of the heart muscle.


So the easy version is that the right and left ventricle are beating at different times and whenever they want. The surgeon came in this morning and took Nathan off the external pacemaker to see if there was any correction and there was not. They will keep him on the external pacemaker for a week, unless he starts to beat in normal rhythm, then after a week if there is no improvement he will need an internal or permanent pacemaker.

The original plan was to move Nathan out of the ICU after two days if he was stable. Due to him having the external pacemaker he will stay in the ICU.

Please pray that the damage done from the surgery heal and be reversed!

I do have some pictures and will post them when I can. Right now I am blogging from my cell so no posting of pictures at this point. We will continue to keep you up to date.

Weary!

This morning the surgery flew by and was done way earlier then expected.  The surgeon was very pleased with how it went and Nathan seemed to be doing fine.  There was however an irregularity in his heart rhythm that they were just watching.

As the afternoon continued Nathan's heart rate dropped and combined with the irregularity was not so great.  They decided to put Nathan on an external pacemaker.  Though this pacemaker is not permanent Jeremy and I can't help but feel though we are just a small step away from Nathan having to return to the OR to have an internal (permanent) pacemaker installed.

God is in the Heart business and I know deep down He is cradling Nathan in is arms.  However please keep us in pray as the enemy is trying to bring me down with lies!  I pray over my son but am feeling the lies of the enemy telling me that my prayers are useless.  "Didn't you try this with your Father and those prayers weren't answered?!"  is the thought he keeps putting in my head.  I know God is faithful and I know my God answers prayer, but I also know that I am weak right now and need you all to hold me up in prayer, just as Aaron and Hur held Moses' hands when he was were weary so I plead with you to hold us in prayer in our time of weariness!

Nathan is a little trooper and has woken up only a couple of times today, each time being as cute as ever!  His personality shows through the medication and pain!

I will keep you all updated as I can!  Love you all!